Feb 60th

In Leap years are longer in South Korea I explained about the calender in my car. I suspect that April the 1st it will rectify itself so here is the last picture of Febraury.

Let you know what happens.



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Bazza

The Least Honest Four Words in English

English is a strange language. A simple phrase where the words seem to mean esteem can actually mean contempt when spoken. There are number of phrases like this and below is the one I hate right now. Feel free to add a comment if you have a favorite of your own.

Today I was walking past a conference room at the office where I work and overheard an aggressive voice saying the phrase. As usual the aggressive voice immediately followed it up with something pretty unpleasant.

Then tonight, the phrase was uttered on TV during a phone-in, the host followed it up by completely rubbishing the callers point. The phrase ...

"With all due respect..."

Whenever I hear it seems to actually mean:

"You are wrong---shut up! You are due no respect"

It is nearly always deeply offensive so if you say it - STOP.


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Bazza

During leap years February is a little longer in South Korea

As I described in 2 Green Dots and 28 Green Bars my car has a little green clock. Well those cunning South Korean Hyundai engineers also put in a calendar. On the 12th of March my wife and I were driving back from dinner and she happened to notice the date that was being displayed on the calendar. Seems the Hyundai engineers may have missed something …





Feb 29 + 12 = 41 so at least it is right!


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Bazza

Sit Down, Be Quiet and Eat Your Poison

Last week I found myself recounting this story to a bunch of people and being lazy have decided to plagerise myself and reproduce the tale here.

When my sons were around 3 and 4 I used to look after them all weekend and so had to cook meals for them. One Sunday evening I decided to cook fish fingers (Breadcrumb coated fillets of cod - very popular with kids). The children had been playing up all day so were under strict instructions not to leave the table until all their food was eaten.

I served up their dinner and continued cleaning up the house. I checked up on the boys every minute or so but they were not eating.
I told them again, "You will go straight to bed - no story - no TV, unless you eat it all".

After about fifteen minutes I was beginning to get very angry at the lack of consumption, when the 4 year old came and found me in the kitchen.
Like a reverse of the scene from Oliver twist, in a faltering voice said , "Please don't be mad but we've eaten as much as we could, it's just we don't think these should be like this".
He held out a fish finger, which on closer inspection, was slightly burnt on the outside and still frozen solid on the inside.

We went to McDonalds.

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Bazza

Sparky reads the Blog!

When I first told my eldest son about Speedy and Sparky, the Chipmunks who live on the grass bank outside my kitchen, he said I should be careful as all Chipmunks are evil (the cuteness is just a cover) and they are all plotting to take over the world. The then 12 year old said that Chipmunk's borrows are full clever machines and computers with lots of flashing lights, some of those tape reel things that go round for no reason. I thought he was joking until recently.

Three weeks ago I wrote about not having seen either Speedy or Sparky all winter in 'Missing Speedy and Sparky'. I surmised it was too cold and harsh for them and I even expressed concern about whether they had enough food.

Just after the posting one of those machines, deep below the muddy grass bank, must have whirred into life. Speedy wobbles up to the screen and reads a blog in increasing rage: 'Too harsh? Not enough food?" He screams in a Chipmunk, "I'll show the humans!"

He waits his chance and it occurs the very next weekend. Overnight there is a snowfall of about eight inches - perfect time to prove me worng - up he pops, larger than life and clearly not starving.



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Bazza